Me: I like a girl, she may like me too. Pretty much just friends.

Will: Likes a girl who may like him too. Friends

Mason: Likes girls, but has no freaking clue if he even likes anyone at the moment.

Mitchell: Is gay and has been on dates with the guy. Has like a 98.9% chance of having an actual relationship.

Moral of the story - If you’re a straight 16 year old guy, you have no chance.

Modified lyrics to fit my life.